1. This code doesn’t need commenting.
  2. This shouldn’t take long.
  3. I can do it better myself.
  4. I’ll fix this later.
  5. It’s only a small change.
  6. It’s not a bug.
  7. I know what I’m doing.
  8. I can safely skip that test.
  9. I’m using <NAME OF FAVORITE PROGRAMMING LANGUAGE HERE> so we’re good.